Monday 7 October 2013

Oh shit...

Well...I had the results of my scan.

It wasn't what I wanted. My heart function has only gone up 3% in 4 months from 25% to 28%. 

I was bitterly disappointed, I was so so so hoping to be at 30% at least, I thought it would be more. 

Before I get a slew of 'but it is an improvement!' comments I'll explain a bit more about why I am disappointed.



At 30% function I am at a significantly reduced risk from 'sudden cardiac death' syndrome, and I have less chance of relapsing back into full blown heart failure again. Also, the scans aren't that accurate, so I could just have stayed the same.

It also means my heart is repairing itself much, much slower than we'd hoped, so I'm worried they may suggest I need and Internal Cardiac Defibrillator (ICD) and I do not want this....DO NOT WANT.



There isn't much more we can do, medication wise, to speed it along.This is because I'm already on the maximum dose for my Beta Blockers (they slow heart rate down), but we have upped the dose of my ACE Inhibitor (dilates arteries, blood vessels etc so heart doesn't have to work so hard) a bit more.

So I have another 4-6 months of just waiting. I wanted to be out of my holding pattern so I could feel confident about getting on with my life a bit more, but no...not happening.

So now you can see my disappointment.

I am going to make a bigger push with the weight loss, as bad habits have been creeping back in, mostly eating out too much (heh). SO I've talked with my good old GP about diet and have a solid eating plan to follow.

My heart nurse has also suggested we start up an exercise programme, now I feel a little more able bodied. This will take place in hospital so I can be monitored closely (in case I have a heart attack, fall over and die).

I wish I could say I feel more positive, but I don't, I just feel tired and so fed up. Without the support of my wonderful partner, family and friends I would just give up and hide under a duvet until the next cardiologist appointment in January.

To cheer myself up I'm going to have a Parks and Recreation marathon. Please enjoy this appropriately themed GIF of Ron Swanson dancing.


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